my current word is eep.. i just keep saying it... make it stop!!!!!!!!!!!!! eep! ............. *runs around frantically in cirles* ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! stop teh eep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!! *dies*

my eyes hurt! the computer is hurting my eyes! maybe itz time i go to bed... *sigh* i wanna re-paint my nails tomarrow then... .... god.. this was a short pointless entry.... oh well...

i'm tired and bored! i can't think of wat to say! i'm cold! my house is freezing as always... i don't wanna get up and get the fleece blanket.. but i will. and i don't wanna go to bed... i will later....
.... i wish u were here to chat with! you can usually wake me up somewhat!

well.. i'm back from camp... i've obtained a broken heart.. but it will mend.... but i had fun... on sunday i leave for a different camp... i'll be there 2 weeks! i've never been away 2 full weeks in a row from my family like this before... but i found that at camp.. you have too much fun to really miss anyone............ i should go take a shower now.... i'll write more later! (plus.. i'll also be putting nail polish on later)

there's nothing to do.... i feel so blank and empty inside.. my emotion is kind of gone... like it was swept away.. i all the sudden feel weary... and i feel depressed somehow too..... i guess its my heart... loving someone i can't reach... i wish so deeply to be in someone's arms.. to be held close to them... to just feel loved in truth... a love that isn't through a window in which all isn;t real... i want it to come true.. and become real.. to have them around me all the time.... to see my friends.. to do something.. to be out of this cage they call a home.. i can't wait for camp.. where i can feel free... and draw things on the lake.. but my computer is the box that holds me together... but i'll survive.... for i long to feel freedom.. to swim.... to run.. to laugh.. to cheer until i lose my voice... to ride a horse.. and gallop off.... to feel a cool breeze as i cayak across the water....... all the sudden i feel happy.. full of joy and content.. beyond any other,.... why these things happen i may never know... i can only imagine...... but maybe its when someone else is happy.... maybe they are my true love... i may never know if that be true.. but for now... i am content..